As an experiment, try to respond to whatever you have in front of you, acquaintance or dearest friend, relative or lover, says, looking only at the exact words they use, without prejudice, prejudgement, pre-understanding. Just respond to their actual words. Request people do the same with you. It’s way way more difficult than you might think. But stick with it, and I’m ready to bet 90% of your relational problems and conflicts will dissolve.